Posts Tagged ‘accept differences’

“What’s wrong with that person?”

Posted in Articles on July 30th, 2010 by admin – 4 Comments
Me painting easter eggs with my autistic nephew, Harry, and my daughter, Helen.

Me painting easter eggs with my autistic nephew, Harry, and my daughter, Helen.

“What’s wrong with her?” I over hear someone ask about a child who seems to have autism. This scenario plays itself out over and over again around the globe. Someone in a wheelchair, someone who is blind, deaf, short, tall, with cerebal palsy, severe injuries gets asked this question. This leads me to ask “What is wrong with us?” How do we have this global reaction to difference? Maybe nothing is wrong with these people, maybe, they just wear there differences in a more obvious way than most. If everyone in the world were the same, the world would stop. Think about it. If we lived in a world where everyone were like me, for example, we’d have a whole bunch of people who love to talk about healing, do lots of painting, write poetry, spend time with their family, yes, that’s all good, but who would invent and build the computer I am typing on, or the lights that I am using, or grow the food I eat, or make the car I drive? So, diversity is a gift to us all. We may not clearly see the purpose of each other’s differences, but they are there.

We can reach even further on this theme and look more closely at how we speak about even our “normal” friends. (”The only normal people are the ones you don’t know very well”-Joe Ancis). How often does conversation about a mutual friend or family member revolve around how you or others think they should change? Or how often are we “hurt” because someone didn’t act how we would have or we wanted to? I have a friend who never called me back when I called her. For years I got so frustrated by her behaviour. I wanted her to call me back within a day or two, just like I would if I were her. Well, I am not her! So, I reflected on that and decided that if I want to be her friend, I have to accept her and love her for the way she is, not try to change her. It was such a great relief for me to no longer be victimized by what she was “doing to me”. I knew it was a weak spot for her and not personal. So, I accepted that difference between us.

So, let’s try to ask the question “What’s right with that person?” more often. Imagine the energy shift in that question. Next time you are thinking of or talking about a friend or loved one. Try coming up with what you love about them. How uplifting would that be? What if that became the global question?-Amy Roemer 7-30-10